Jesus of Nazareth, known as "J-dogg" by some

[Lucifer Sam]

You have to feel some sympathy for poor Jesus though - slowly being erased from history and culture. He will be turning in his sepulchre...even if Easter was named after a Germanic goddess of spring.

"Don't cry for me, gashonthenail," sings Jesus to the tune of Andrew Lloyd Webber. He won't be completely forgotten, and he had a very good run while it lasted. More than anything else he was lucky to have had Paul. Without Paul, Jesus just rots in a criminal's grave and gets forgotten by time, or at best he rates a tiny footnote as a 1st c. Messiah claimant. Don't cry for Paul, either. Paul is possibly the most-read author in all of human history. Not bad for a bald, conflicted, mystical Jew. But you (generic you) have to know when enough is enough. Let Jesus go. He'll be okay. Being seated at the right hand of the Father is probably a pretty good spot.

 

[Lucifer Sam]

He takes the Bible too literally!

I don't take the bible too literally. If I did, I'd have to believe that Jesus turned Simon into a literal rock, or Herod was a literal fox, or Jesus was literally a lamb. I don't believe that. I think the bible uses metaphor all the time.

The reason I didn't put "Jesus was from another planet" in the poll options is because I couldn't include every possible iteration of Jesus without spending years making the poll, probably only to find that I'd wasted my time because the forum limits the number of options. That's why I offered an option for "other (please explain)." Anyway, this is a vanity thread and the options are whatever I wanted them to be. "Edith Sitwell" was put there just for Carlislebaz, but somehow it got three votes.

 

[Vesper Nocturne]

This is exactly what I was talking about.

 

[Lucifer Sam]

Jesus and Adam and Eve could all have been from another planet. I don't object to that theory. I think it (or something like it) might even be a doctrine in Mormonism. Not for Adam and Eve obviously, they were from North America in Mormonism, but I think Jesus and God are interplanetary according to the Mormons.

Forgive my autism, but I don't see how things would change much if it was true. Jesus would still be off somewhere else, whether it's in heaven or in another solar system (or even in this one). Can he communicate with us would still be the question.

 

[nicky wire's legs]

Jesus and Adam and Eve could all have been from another planet. I don't object to that theory. I think it (or something like it) might even be a doctrine in Mormonism. Not for Adam and Eve obviously, they were from North America in Mormonism, but I think Jesus and God are interplanetary according to the Mormons.

Forgive my autism, but I don't see how things would change much if it was true. Jesus would still be off somewhere else, whether it's in heaven or in another solar system (or even in this one). Can he communicate with us would still be the question.

It would explain what happened with the dinosaurs is all (I was watching unherd whence I had the brainwave)

 

[Lucifer Sam]

It would explain what happened with the dinosaurs is all (I was watching unherd whence I had the brainwave)

I'm not following. How would Adam and Eve being from a different planet explain what happened to the dinosaurs?

 

[nicky wire's legs]

I'm not following. How would Adam and Eve being from a different planet explain what happened to the dinosaurs?

Humans and dinosaurs are incompatible. So needing the planet for the banished humans, God decided the dinosaurs needed to go. It's not rocket science, audrey!

 

[Lucifer Sam]

Humans and dinosaurs are incompatible. So needing the planet for the banished humans, God decided the dinosaurs needed to go. It's not rocket science, audrey!

You're right, it's definitely not rocket science. We'll leave it at that.

 

[on his way out]

 

[Lucifer Sam]

Haram.

 

[TheSmiths_1985]

Haram.

No thanks, pork gives me the shits.

 

[caramel sea salt]

 

[Lucifer Sam]

No thanks, pork gives me the shits.

I thought everything gave you the shits.

 

[TheSmiths_1985]

I thought everything gave you the shits.

We’re on this ride together.

 

[Lucifer Sam]

َقَوْلِهِمْ إِنَّا قَتَلْنَا ٱلْمَسِيحَ عِيسَى ٱبْنَ مَرْيَمَ رَسُولَ ٱللَّهِ وَمَا قَتَلُوهُ وَمَا صَلَبُوهُ وَلَـٰكِن شُبِّهَ لَهُمْ ۚ وَإِنَّ ٱلَّذِينَ ٱخْتَلَفُوا۟ فِيهِ لَفِى شَكٍّۢ مِّنْهُ ۚ مَا لَهُم بِهِۦ مِنْ عِلْمٍ إِلَّا ٱتِّبَاعَ ٱلظَّنِّ ۚ وَمَا قَتَلُوهُ يَقِينًۢا

بَل رَّفَعَهُ ٱللَّهُ إِلَيْهِ ۚ وَكَانَ ٱللَّهُ عَزِيزًا حَكِيمًۭا

---

And because of their saying: We slew the Messiah, Jesus son of Mary, Allah's messenger—They slew him not nor crucified him, but it appeared so unto them; and lo! those who disagree concerning it are in doubt thereof; they have no knowledge thereof save pursuit of a conjecture; they slew him not for certain.
But Allah took him up unto Himself. Allah was ever Mighty, Wise.

Surah IV.157-158

 

[nicky wire's legs]

 

[Gregor Samsa]

Watched this yesterday morning after church. Lovely coincidence. Have you seen it?

 

[nicky wire's legs]

Watched this yesterday morning after church. Lovely coincidence. Have you seen it?

Um yeah, many times. It's at least in my top 25, some days maybe my top ten. A beautiful film.

 

[nicky wire's legs]

Did you know that the aged Mary is played by pasolini's beloved mother?

 

[Gregor Samsa]

Did you know that the aged Mary is played by pasolini's beloved mother?

I didn’t! But I thought she had a very beautiful face. She felt like the real deal. So much raw emotion in that face.