1. Stalker meets Moz in local supermarket. Asks about new album to which Moz pretends to choke himself with a pepperami. Asks about Johnny Marr's album to which he replies "Johnny who?" in a roundabout sort of way.

2. Last night I took a dump which looked a bit like Morrissey. My friends told me I should take a polaroid of it and send it here. Gee, I hope you like it.

3. Czech ballroom dancing champion Ozrek Ranjikka likes Morrissey. Apparently.

4. The Clapham Gazette lists "Mute Witness" at no 19 in Top 20 Clapham Common Pop Moments poll.

5. Etcetra. Etcetera...